With the Immigration law and the law banning social studies in effect, below are 10 things not to do in Arizona:
1. Don’t Drive in a funeral procession.
With the drug wars in Mexico, the authorities may believe that you are burying a family member from Mexico. If you drive in a funeral procession, the entire procession may be taken to jail and the corpse sent to Mexico.
2. Don’t tell your kids about the Civil War.
If you do, you will be violating the law banning teaching social studies when you reach the topic on slavery.
3. Don’t go to a tanning salon.
If you come out with a tan, you will definitely look Hispanic. If you don’t have a US passport with you, good luck with your freedom.
4. Don’t eat tacos.
Don’t eat tacos and do not go to restaurants that serve tacos. You definitely have Mexican tendencies and may be one.
5. Don’t learn a foreign language.
Whether you are speaking Chinese, French, German, Hebrew, the police will think it is Spanish and will get you.
6. Don’t drive a van with family members in it.
The police will think that you are smuggling people from Mexico and you will definitely be taken to the county jail.
7. Don’t pay with cash at the supermarket.
Why are you paying with cash if you have a debit card? The police will think that you don’t have a debit card because you are illegal and have no papers to open a bank account.
8. Don’t have a name that ends in z, a, o, n, e,s,l,r.
These endings are used by Hispanics such as Perez, Maria, Hernando, Juan, Jose, Mercedes, Miguel, Xavier. Change your name to stay out of trouble
9. Don’t send your kids to a diverse school.
If you send your kids to school with kids from different backgrounds, you are definitely using your kids as a social studies’ pawns. You are breaking the law.
10. Don’t watch Rick Sanchez on CNN.
If you can understand the term “fotos del dia”, you are in trouble. Beside, watching Sanchez means that you like people whose names end in z, a big clue that you are Hispanic.
